


Tidal

by Jheselbraum



Category: Gravity Falls
Genre: Angst, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Panic Attacks
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-03
Updated: 2017-03-03
Packaged: 2018-09-27 23:59:00
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 507
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10057826
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Jheselbraum/pseuds/Jheselbraum
Summary: Ford couldn't be happier to be sailing the world with his brother, but Stan's beginning to have his doubts.





	

**Author's Note:**

> A commission for [ minimysterytwins ](http://minimysterytwins.tumblr.com) on tumblr!

Stan’s shaking hands gripped the railing of the boat, knuckles so white they made the sea ice in the distance look dark by comparison.

“I just—“ His voice cracked when he felt Ford’s hand rest on his shoulder, slowly rubbing circles in Stan’s back, holding him close. Stan took a few deep breaths that felt shakier and smaller than they really were. “I’m worried that you’re only here c-cause of some dumb obligation,” he spat the sentence out, rushed and nearly lost to the Arctic winds.

“Stan?” Ford spoke softly, wrapping his lean frame around Stan’s larger one best he could, as if shielding him from the world.

“I’m not _that_ much of an idiot, Ford. I know you never wanted to go sailing with me,” Stan shivered, burying his face in his brother’s chest. “Not even when we were kids. And I know you feel guilty, ‘cause of what happened to my memories. You don’t have to pretend around me, you know?”

Ford stared at his brother, at a loss for what to say, what to do to make everything okay again. “You… you think I don’t want to be here?” He stammered, his voice small and thin, shaking as much as his brother was. “Oh, Stan… Stan I’m so sorry.”

“How can you stand to _be_ around me?!” Stan squeezed his eyes shut, forcing tears down his cheeks, flinching as a million thoughts raced through his mind, telling him in no uncertain terms just how _much_ Ford hated him. How _he’s only out here because he doesn’t know how to tell you to get lost, he doesn’t want to hurt your feelings._ “I never did you any good, I ruined your life _and_ mine!”

“Stan, how can you say that?” Ford’s voice cracked and he dug his fingers into Stan’s jacket, a lump forming in his throat as he felt Stan’s tears soaking through his sweater. “You’ve done so much for the world, for the kids! For me… And even if you hadn’t, you’re an amazing person and an amazing brother. I don’t care if you’ve done anything ‘worthwhile’ or not. I care about _you._ And being here, traveling the world with my brother, my best friend, is more than I could ever ask.” Ford pulled away, just slightly, just enough so he could look Stanley in the eyes as he spoke. “You don’t give yourself enough credit, and you worry about me too much. I’m _here_ because I _want_ to be. I _want_ you here with me.”

“How, though? How do you not _hate_ me?” Stan asked, his hands shaking as he felt his lungs screaming for air, barely able to take in the cold fog around them.

“Because you didn’t do anything to deserve it, and I’m sorry for taking so long to realize that,” Ford said, softly. “No matter how angry I was, you didn’t deserve what happened.”

“Ford?”

“Yes, Stanley?”

“If you don’t hate me, why can’t I stop hating myself?”

“I don’t know, but I’ll ride it out with you.”


End file.
